(wheeze) this harem- i mean friend group for our MC is incredibly awesome rune seems like such a fancy (gal, i made them a gal in my playthrough) mage
had to restart from the beginning so I speedran it as Fiorayne again, named the horse Luchika and the wolf Rondine. if you didn't see my first comment i'm a huge monster hunter nerd LOL.
however if i had to choose my favorite oswin is just him childhood friend who's risking his ass to save us and him talking about how he felt "useless" resonates with me fr
current ranking of our mc's party
1. oswin (i vibe with him heavy) 2. rune (she's cool. also i love bard characters) 3. duri (he's such a silly, getting bitten by my horsie luchika) 4. zahn (he's so sweet and precious aaaaaaa)
all 4 of them are absolutely excellent and i would gladly befriend any of them
can't wait for god-cursed to finish because I AM GOING TO PLAY THROUGH IT MULTIPLE TIMES
mrs lunan your writing is incredible and you have me invested so badly you truly are a brilliant writer fr <3
in the words of Senator Palpatine
"We will watch your career with great interest."
also i do hope you enjoyed the monster hunter rise soundtrack!!! really gives more atmosphere when I read, cus I listen to music that's appropriate whenever I read something story (chill music for most parts, fight music for fights, and other thematically appropriate songs)
that's enough yapping from me
Love, LightningMeliodas
P.S. [i'm writing my own IF story and coding is incredibly painful. tips would be very much appreciated].
Hello again, my friend! I am so thrilled you enjoyed this installment as well! And I did have a listen to that soundtrack and it rocks! I listened to it on repeat while I worked and wrote, lol. I've never played Monster Hunter but I'd like to check it out sometime.
I'm happy to try and give you some insight on coding if you like. I'm no expert at all, but if I can help guide you I will. If you're on Tumbrl you can pop out an ask or something to me with your questions, I won't publish your answers if you don't want me to, I can just message you back. ^_^
I'm so sorry! 😭 The hard saves were broken too I think.
I've been trying to figure out Butler to run updates without shattering everything but my old laptop refuses to even install it. I need to patch ch 5 but I don't want to do it until I can either convince my laptop to work or borrow another computer.
AGH I just LOVE this IF so much! Rarely do I find an IF that I love all the RO's a lot, though Oswin will be my all-time favorite♥
That scene with Oswin talking about how he was "useless"(Or at least I'm pretty sure that's what he said, Bad memory ಥ_ಥ) made me wanna cry and Hug him forever💔
Is it awful that I want to poly romanticatize all the characters?! I really appreciate and love the merchant man! (/≧▽≦)/ Oh man, I THINK I'M IN LOVE WITH THEM ALL! I really enjoy that my MC has a meekly kind personality and all the characters fine her cute, cause when I attempted to flirt, it failed but in the end works and I LOVE IT! (Oswin is such an overprotective man, if only I can see what's he's really hiding though!) Oh, and uhm... Zahn, such a cutie pie! (*´ω｀*) But then Duri, you damn sly dog, I hate it and love it at the same time, such a tease! Oh Rune, my heart, ack, he's an hopeless romantic introverted guy that I too wanna let my character swoon more! (I wanna try to do a one night stand for MC, but I dismissed the idea, instead I wanna see how it goes for her first time with the primary love interest!) For now, chapters... I crave for more stories! I can't wait, I got myself fanning here, that's truly awesome work of fiction you've created! So far, I haven't encountered no grammar or anything wrong! Is it possible to see official art of the characters mention in the story for future update or complete final next year? I can see plenty of potential fanart right now, if any are actually made now. (人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+
Just, whoa, this is seriously good stuff, I think Imma do another read but changed the personality and perspective of the MC this time! <(￣︶￣)> Time to make another save slots for a different approach, heh! ( ´◡‿ゝ◡`)
That's not awful at all, dear, I'm so happy you've found something to love about all of them. If you'd like a bit more of our beloved merchant man, I wrote an extra about how he found his kitty cat. It's a little look at his past at least. It's here if you'd like to read it: https://www.tumblr.com/wings-of-ink/771243881131081728/how-about-a-little-someth...
I'm so thrilled that you are looking forward to future updates! I am so excited to get chapter 6 going too! My plan is to try to raise funds to put toward official art via ko-fi and Patreon starting in January. When those are made, they'll be put into the game. Some artists have done some fanart already based on what they can dream up from the pinterest boards if you'd like to take a look at those. https://pin.it/2Vq0HGVzi
Enjoy your second read! I hope you find something new and interesting. ^_^
i would like to say. i enjoyed this a lot, it took a lot of time since i wanted to cherish every chapter. i liked every character. they were very unique. but i wanted to know if poly would be possible here. i love them all, i can't help it T_T. they're all so loveable!
I'm so glad you enjoyed and savored your read, my friend! I'm happy you like all the characters so much too. Sorry to say that there's no poly options for this particular story, but I'm aiming to do that in future IFs. ^_^
aaaa thats nice to know and its a shame there isn't gonna be any poly but overall i love this story you have made. i would redo every chapter on this<///3 but im very glad i have found this, i'm looking forward to your work and process!, i see a lot of potential on your story!! <3
i also plan to make my own and seeing yours has given me a lot of motivation!!
Thank you so much! I'm so excited to bring more of this story out too. There are so many juice mysteries to unravel! And heck yeah, write your story! Making them can be daunting, but stick with it. They are so rewarding too. ^_^
hello, just wrapped up the demo! depending on my time i might replay to see some of the other content i didn't lean into, but i'm solidly happy with my choices. i named myself noodles on impulse (and have been greatly amused by people's reactions to that), and to keep the theme my mule is named pasta and the wolf is named gnocchi.
nathan is a scoundrel and i love him greatly. even if he's probably up to no good. tragically he will not reciprocate my advances no matter how hard i try. zahn is very cute I love her, she's like. she's so good. such a sweetheart. told myself i would be normal about the demigod and then i met her and needless to say I am hopeless for duri. oswin gets on my nerves but I respect him, solid dude. Lakota... <3 bestie for the restie. and da and papa are fantastic. rune is cool. I hope jasper blows up rapidly. aster is on thin ice LOL
all of this basically to say I love this story so far and I will be eagerly keeping an eye on its progress!!!! you're a fantastic writer
Hello there! Love that you tried out Noodles! The plan is to go back through and add more flavor text for that and a few other name selections. I adore that you have an entire troupe of pasta, lol.
I'm trying to wiggle him in a bit more, so no worries, you'll cross paths again eventually!
Your assessments of everyone made me smile, lol. You are very wise. Thank you so much for your kind words, I'm so glad that you've found something to love here. ^_^
i so cant get enough of duri hes my man i will kill whoever else he flirts with but also aster seems interesting... :P i rushed to play as soon as i saw the update and i LOVE it, super excited for more <3 best christmas present ever fr
I tried to load my progress from my disc but it wont upload... Maybe a bug or something else perhaps? I was waiting for the update but imma start from the 1st chapter now lol
anyway, Dear author you have golden hands! I luv everything!!!!
Not necessarily a bug, but saves were going to be broken for sure. Some of the code from the first chapters had to be altered to get Ch 5 to work, and in order to get fonts to change correctly I had to change a few other things around - it was a whole deal. But future updates should also include a skip function so just in case saves break or you just want to try other things that will be an option instead of speedrunning 300million passages, lol. I am glad you still love it though, my dear, you are too kind. ^_^
I went back into the game today, and all my saves and progress were gone. Every time I opened the game they would be there, but today is an exception. I was just about to start Chapter 4, too. I will download my saves for my next playthrough, though I imagine it will take a few days to get back to where I was. But the game is definitely worth that time.
I'm so sorry, my friend. I knew saves would break. There was just too much that ended up changing for chapter 5 to work. I will be implementing a skip function as a sort of failsafe in the future though. Thank you for sticking with it though and spending the time to get through it. ^_^
Weirdly after a few replays oswin s growing on me I found him a bit dry on the early chapters but he seems to have more a personality in chapters 4 too 5 Duri will always be best boy though for me will there ever be a poly route?
Thank you so much! Zahn gave me so many fits, so this really helps! (Spent 4 hours troubleshooting their whole scene today, lol). Glad you enjoyed my friend!
I'm finally finished, that was way too long to be called a 'Demo' are you adding content to it or was that actually an original Demo. Anyways, After I hit chapter 4, I restarted 8 times because, I usually flirt with every woman until I decide who I want to romance, then I restart. And this time I decided I wanted Duri, so I restarted several times because I got uselessly picky and I wanted to see what Duri would say if our hair was Grey like hers. I really can't resist picking Cooking as my skill, the description draws me in the most, and I like to cook IRL as well. Swordplay only interests me because I want to know if I can beat Oswin in that sparring match If I learn Swordplay. Great 'Demo' overall, Spectacular even, Phenomenal, Amazing, Sprezzaturian Level work right here.
The "demo" label just means it's not finished yet. There's not currently (nor I believe ever will be, though I can't verify that) a distinction between a demo and a complete version.
Hello there! Thanks for reading. I agree, this is HUGE, lol. I added the "demo" actually as part of a requirement for the Amare Games jam submission. I guess it technically still is one, but it is growing ferociously. Part of that growth actually is that I may add a few more comments on hair/eye variations as well. The cook is a good choice too, I have some fun writing their variations - Chapter 5 now has some really fun ones for them. I try to channel my mother when I think of cook MCs, she's the toughest and tiniest woman I know (she's almost 80 and I am still scared of her). I'm glad you enjoyed it, my friend! I hope there is more in the update that you will like as well. ^_^
okay I just spent two days reading this and I’m blown away. I love the concept so much??? The world you built feels incredibly alive, I really did feel like I was actually there while reading. I love the insane amount of variations you’re doing with the flirting choices 🫶🏽 OSWIN HAS MY HEARTTTT I love his whole character and the dynamic you can build with him is beautiful. To be honest, I love all the LIs you’ve introduced so far. Zahn and Duri are everything to me as well. The customisation + branching is SO good. I’m so excited to see where this goes and I can’t believe I only just got around to reading it (it’s been in my library for while!) I LOVE UR WORK‼️🫶🏽 thank u!!
I did have a question: I know u have a form to report bugs etc, does this include typos you’d want readers to point out? I hope that doesn’t come across nit-picky x
Thank you, my friend! I'm so happy you enjoyed it! I'm cooking up more and will have an update soon as well. You are welcome to report typos too in the error form, but you may be there all day, lol. Once chapter 5 is out (*cough, later this weekend I hope, cough*), all the chapters are getting a good old scrub for typos and such. Not a full re-work, just a polish. I figured out a system to help me find those pesky errors (I am dyslexic & ADHD, which makes editing a super-challenge), and I think I can make some good improvements with what I've worked out. So, I still welcome any help you want to provide, but please don't put yourself out either, my dear. ^_^
I just hit chapter 3 and I gotta say, the story is great. Very unique, the descriptions in just about everything is impeccable, I never thought words could make me flinch but when that Cow was dying giving birth I actually cried and that surprised the hell out of me. The customization is vast and important surprisingly and the Characters are okay too, I honestly only care for my Parents but hey. Only problem I have is. WHERE. ARE. THE. WOMEN. I saw the Gender-Selectable people before I started righting this but I don't think I've seen a woman our age besides Kanta who's a One Night Stand. I most definitely gotta restart though, reread and all that.
Thank you, my friend! I am glad you are enjoying it! I hope the death of the cow didn't hit too hard, and if it's any consolation - I cried while writing it. I love cows, all animals really, it was hard. And I'm not sure where all the women are, lol. MC just isn't around many other people their age, in general, at least in the glimpse you get into their early life (there will be more memories and new characters that pop up later though). Willow, who becomes Lakota's wife, doesn't get screen time for the sake of story-focus (yet, more on her in ch 6 in future), but she's probably the main woman around MC that is around their age. The twin sisters are a decent bit older and have this silent-watcher thing going and Betony is more of a mom role. It's not intentional, I can promise you that. I also don't care much for typical gender roles so I tend to write male characters that fill roles you typically see for women characters or with characteristics that tend to get stereotyped as feminine. And I like women-badies (that goes for villains big and small, and general badasses). The Twinflower women have some secrets, btw. I hope it isn't too much of a downer and dampens your enjoyment. ^_^
I'm very excited for the next chapter! Are we going to be able to meet Rune? So far, it's been at least one LI introduction per chapter. Keep up the great work. Take breaks when you need them and hope you enjoy your holidays. <3
I am also excited for the next chapter! It was delayed from my original goal of November, but it is getting so very close to being ready. I'm editing some final parts and might actually add a bit more to it too (just a tiny bit, another little kiss at the end). ^_^
I just finished the fourth chapter and woah… this is awesome?? It’s very well written and the level of choices and customization is so much more than I’ve seen in games in a similar format. You should be really proud of yourself, Lunan, and make sure to rest when you need it!! :)
Sorry, my dear, for this story it likely won't happen. But I am considering it for future ones! I just want to write that sort of love story with as much authenticity as I can. ^_^
I would say he loves you back, but Oswin would get all huffy and embarrassed and it would be a whole thing, lol. Just hang on a bit and he'll tell you himself. ;)
Thanks for your work and I enjoyed my time. Read through it in a couple of evenings as when I get into books/stories I tend to power through them.
*Warning* Very light spoilers ahead but I’ll try to keep it vague.
I was already quite interested in the setting and story from the start but I found I became more invested after chapter 3 when things open up more and it feels you have more choices to make and influence on how it all unfolds.
You really do a good job with making some of the even more mundane choices feel surprisingly meaningful among IFs that I’ve read. Even things like hair/eye colour had a couple interesting bits in the story attached to them beyond just being tags for your character’s appearance. I was also impressed with things like your choice of career pursuit and hobby having interactions.
For feedback, not too much to complain about. There were some spelling and grammar mistakes but it wasn’t too frequent and this is still a work in progress. Some more customization options would be nice I suppose? I think it is already quite good though, and I appreciate being able to customize the mc at all. I’m biased in this regard as I really enjoy character creation/customization.
I look forward to more and hope all goes well for you.
Thank you so much for the feedback, I'm glad that you found your read enjoyable. I have really loved doing this project and trying to fit in things that I would want to see while reading IFs. My goal is to make those facets of your character feel as real as possible while trying to avoid ham-fisting it. When I get a spot of time to sit down and clean up the first few chapters (definitely going to hit the grammar hard then too), I want to add a bit more customization and refine what is already there. If you have ideas for additions, I happily take suggestions. If you prefer, you can pop them into the error report form instead. It's linked in the game. ^_^
Can't wait for the next chapter bcoz this was so fun!! I was completely invested, the plot is great and the characters are well-written. Duri really swept me off my feet as soon as he appeared lol I folded so fast 🤭
I'm so glad you had fun, my dear! Trying to get the update out the first week of December (hit some delays in November, but it's getting there)! Duri has been a persistent heart-stealer, lol. Very appropriate. ^_^
im deep into chapter four and i dont wanna finish it yet 💔but holy moly... this game is so good what the flip, Oswin has to be my favorite so far :D i also love the map of the clearing in chp3, unexpected but it was super cool!!1 Definitely have gained a new devoted follower, cant wait for this to be updated C:
Thank you, my friend! I am very glad you connected with it, and I am happy you're here. ^_^
I'm currently working on an update too. I was really trying to get it out in November, but life kinda got in the way, so I'm thinking it's going to be the first week of December instead.
omg i love the plot and the characters- damn they're so fine. Also is there a chance that there's poly routes!! I would love to see one with Duri and Oz, literally one's a wolf and u have a guy trying to convince evryone that wolves will never hurt anyone unless necessary though not necessarily Duri in particular >:D seems like there could be more going on HAHA literally thinking abt how Oz may bicker with Duri when he's in human form but softens whenever he's in wolf form bcos he can't help his fondness for his wolf form! eager for the next chapter while i go back to studying for my finals hehe :3
Hello my friend! I am glad that you are enjoying it! Unfortunately for this story, there won't be poly routes, but I can def see where a Duri-Oswin match would be a lot of fun though (super flipping cute!). In future IFs, I may do some poly romances, but for these characters for one reason or another, I didn't feel that it fit them as well. It's something I've been mulling on though, so we'll see what happens! ^_^
peak fiction fr ToT I AM SOSOSO INVESTED TO SEE HOW THIS TURNS OUT!!!!
comments on our companions/ROs
(playing with a female character for now) oswin: he's got that dawg in him but i like his protective spirit zahn: such a goofy goober, love him duri: why does he remind me of gale and halsin from BG3 at the same time
i love the dads and lakota sm!!! they really make me feel like my character got the love she needs to keep going!
and i love my horsie Luchika ofc :3
keep it up!!! I really am invested to see how this goes! if there's one thing i can recommend
listen to some music when writing <3 really helps get you into the vibe of what you write... i personally listened to the MHRise soundtrack while reading because oml it fit well with my character (fiorayne)...
but enough yapping from a monster hunter nerd... ENJOY THIS PEAK! i'm rooting for you!! and in the words of palpatine... "We will watch your career with great interest."
-love, LightningMeliodas, just a random monster hunter nerd and avid gamer.
Thank you my dear! I am so glad you are enjoying the story and characters! There will be more to love soon. I also love some tunes while I write or read, I'll check out that soundtrack too! ^_^
I just finished through chapter 4 and I love this so muchhh. (btw maybe spoilers so CAUTION :> )
Anyways, I just want to say how much I love this story, the world building, even the characters!
I love the parents so muchhh, right when they were mentioned, I already loved them (I even maybe almost cried at a few scenes including the cow scene tbh )
I also really love all the little details and interactions with the characters and how they interacted w/ each other (platonic or not).
And I just wanted to say, the world building of this story is amazing, every little addition to the story always left me a little amazed. I really can't wait until chapter 5 comes out!
Though I do understand writing all that takes a lot time (and work!) So take your time ofc! Take breaks if you need them!
Anyways, for now, I'll probably re-play for each of the romances/companions (prob Duri first) >:D
Thank you so much for the kind words, my friend! I am so glad you are finding so much to enjoy. I can't wait to get chapter 5 out, my goal is to have it out this month (it's been a rough month though, but I am striving forward on it)! ^_^
← Return to game
Comments
Log in with itch.io to leave a comment.
HELLO HELLO
meliodas is back again for chapter 5
(wheeze) this harem- i mean friend group for our MC is incredibly awesome
rune seems like such a fancy (gal, i made them a gal in my playthrough) mage
had to restart from the beginning so I speedran it as Fiorayne again, named the horse Luchika and the wolf Rondine. if you didn't see my first comment i'm a huge monster hunter nerd LOL.
however if i had to choose my favorite oswin is just him
childhood friend who's risking his ass to save us and him talking about how he felt "useless"
resonates with me fr
current ranking of our mc's party
1. oswin (i vibe with him heavy)
2. rune (she's cool. also i love bard characters)
3. duri (he's such a silly, getting bitten by my horsie luchika)
4. zahn (he's so sweet and precious aaaaaaa)
all 4 of them are absolutely excellent and i would gladly befriend any of them
can't wait for god-cursed to finish because I AM GOING TO PLAY THROUGH IT MULTIPLE TIMES
mrs lunan your writing is incredible and you have me invested so badly
you truly are a brilliant writer fr <3
in the words of Senator Palpatine
"We will watch your career with great interest."
also i do hope you enjoyed the monster hunter rise soundtrack!!! really gives more atmosphere when I read, cus I listen to music that's appropriate whenever I read something story (chill music for most parts, fight music for fights, and other thematically appropriate songs)
that's enough yapping from me
Love, LightningMeliodas
P.S. [i'm writing my own IF story and coding is incredibly painful. tips would be very much appreciated].
hindsight note: DAMMIT I ALREADY USED THE PALPATINE QUOTE IN MY FIRST REVIEW
ToT
IM SORRY I NEED TO FIND A NEW QUOTE WHEN CHAPTER 6 COMES OUT
No worries, I still enjoyed it the second time too, lol.
Hello again, my friend! I am so thrilled you enjoyed this installment as well! And I did have a listen to that soundtrack and it rocks! I listened to it on repeat while I worked and wrote, lol. I've never played Monster Hunter but I'd like to check it out sometime.
I'm happy to try and give you some insight on coding if you like. I'm no expert at all, but if I can help guide you I will. If you're on Tumbrl you can pop out an ask or something to me with your questions, I won't publish your answers if you don't want me to, I can just message you back. ^_^
o shit my save got deleted :((( (I'm rlly stupid so I didnt make a backup lmao)
same 😭😭
So sorry! I'm trying to work out how to prevent that but my laptop is old and cranky. 😅
It's okay haha dw 🙏 I took it as a sign for me to replay and it was absolutely enjoyable
I'm so glad! I'm a fan of replaying myself, though it can get tedious, so I appreciate that you took the time. ^_^
I'm so sorry! 😭 The hard saves were broken too I think.
I've been trying to figure out Butler to run updates without shattering everything but my old laptop refuses to even install it. I need to patch ch 5 but I don't want to do it until I can either convince my laptop to work or borrow another computer.
lmao it's fine dw abt it XD just gives me an excuse to replay
Hey I love this thinking, lol. Anytime an IF updates I end up restarting anyway because my memory is faulty after reading 400 other stories lol.
THATS SO REAL I HAVE LIKE SO MANY IFS THAT I'M READING AT THE SAME TIME 😭🙏
OSWIN MY POOKIE COOKIE WOOKIE BEAR I LOVE HIM SOMEONE PUT ME DOWN IM RABID
realest opinion about Oswin, I agree strongly.
Lol he'd be a flustered mess if he read this.
AGH I just LOVE this IF so much! Rarely do I find an IF that I love all the RO's a lot, though Oswin will be my all-time favorite♥
That scene with Oswin talking about how he was "useless"(Or at least I'm pretty sure that's what he said, Bad memory ಥ_ಥ) made me wanna cry and Hug him forever💔
I can't wait for the next update (◍•ᴗ•◍)
Is it awful that I want to poly romanticatize all the characters?! I really appreciate and love the merchant man! (/≧▽≦)/ Oh man, I THINK I'M IN LOVE WITH THEM ALL! I really enjoy that my MC has a meekly kind personality and all the characters fine her cute, cause when I attempted to flirt, it failed but in the end works and I LOVE IT! (Oswin is such an overprotective man, if only I can see what's he's really hiding though!) Oh, and uhm... Zahn, such a cutie pie! (*´ω｀*) But then Duri, you damn sly dog, I hate it and love it at the same time, such a tease! Oh Rune, my heart, ack, he's an hopeless romantic introverted guy that I too wanna let my character swoon more! (I wanna try to do a one night stand for MC, but I dismissed the idea, instead I wanna see how it goes for her first time with the primary love interest!) For now, chapters... I crave for more stories! I can't wait, I got myself fanning here, that's truly awesome work of fiction you've created! So far, I haven't encountered no grammar or anything wrong! Is it possible to see official art of the characters mention in the story for future update or complete final next year? I can see plenty of potential fanart right now, if any are actually made now. (人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+
Just, whoa, this is seriously good stuff, I think Imma do another read but changed the personality and perspective of the MC this time! <(￣︶￣)> Time to make another save slots for a different approach, heh! ( ´◡‿ゝ◡`)
That's not awful at all, dear, I'm so happy you've found something to love about all of them. If you'd like a bit more of our beloved merchant man, I wrote an extra about how he found his kitty cat. It's a little look at his past at least. It's here if you'd like to read it: https://www.tumblr.com/wings-of-ink/771243881131081728/how-about-a-little-someth...
I'm so thrilled that you are looking forward to future updates! I am so excited to get chapter 6 going too! My plan is to try to raise funds to put toward official art via ko-fi and Patreon starting in January. When those are made, they'll be put into the game. Some artists have done some fanart already based on what they can dream up from the pinterest boards if you'd like to take a look at those. https://pin.it/2Vq0HGVzi
Enjoy your second read! I hope you find something new and interesting. ^_^
All the romanceable companions are wonderful 😌🩷 I can’t choose 😩😭
I'm glad you like them all though! Just pretend you're at a buffet, you can always come back for seconds...and thirds... ^_^
you’re so right :))
i would like to say. i enjoyed this a lot, it took a lot of time since i wanted to cherish every chapter. i liked every character. they were very unique. but i wanted to know if poly would be possible here. i love them all, i can't help it T_T. they're all so loveable!
I'm so glad you enjoyed and savored your read, my friend! I'm happy you like all the characters so much too. Sorry to say that there's no poly options for this particular story, but I'm aiming to do that in future IFs. ^_^
aaaa thats nice to know and its a shame there isn't gonna be any poly but overall i love this story you have made. i would redo every chapter on this<///3 but im very glad i have found this, i'm looking forward to your work and process!, i see a lot of potential on your story!! <3
i also plan to make my own and seeing yours has given me a lot of motivation!!
Thank you so much! I'm so excited to bring more of this story out too. There are so many juice mysteries to unravel! And heck yeah, write your story! Making them can be daunting, but stick with it. They are so rewarding too. ^_^
hello, just wrapped up the demo! depending on my time i might replay to see some of the other content i didn't lean into, but i'm solidly happy with my choices. i named myself noodles on impulse (and have been greatly amused by people's reactions to that), and to keep the theme my mule is named pasta and the wolf is named gnocchi.
nathan is a scoundrel and i love him greatly. even if he's probably up to no good. tragically he will not reciprocate my advances no matter how hard i try. zahn is very cute I love her, she's like. she's so good. such a sweetheart. told myself i would be normal about the demigod and then i met her and needless to say I am hopeless for duri. oswin gets on my nerves but I respect him, solid dude. Lakota... <3 bestie for the restie. and da and papa are fantastic. rune is cool. I hope jasper blows up rapidly. aster is on thin ice LOL
all of this basically to say I love this story so far and I will be eagerly keeping an eye on its progress!!!! you're a fantastic writer
Hello there! Love that you tried out Noodles! The plan is to go back through and add more flavor text for that and a few other name selections. I adore that you have an entire troupe of pasta, lol.
If you'd like just a little bit more Nathan, there's a mini story posted about how he met Shadow here https://www.tumblr.com/wings-of-ink/771243881131081728/how-about-a-little-someth...
I'm trying to wiggle him in a bit more, so no worries, you'll cross paths again eventually!
Your assessments of everyone made me smile, lol. You are very wise. Thank you so much for your kind words, I'm so glad that you've found something to love here. ^_^
Yay! I got a pet! Loved the update! Didn't disappoint at all
After all you've been through, there's no way your parents can say that you can't keep her either, lol. Glad you loved it, my dear! ^_^
An update! Yeah I have been waiting! I love your work!
My gift to you! Hope you enjoyed! ^_^
The update was amazing! I love this story so much and am always looking forward to more!
Thank you my friend! I'm so happy you enjoyed it! Can't wait to get going on chapter 6, so many fun scenes to write. ^_^
i so cant get enough of duri hes my man
i will kill whoever else he flirts withbut also aster seems interesting... :P i rushed to play as soon as i saw the update and i LOVE it, super excited for more <3 best christmas present ever frzahn is absolutely adorable im in love!!!!
Very sweet, 10/10, would feed again.
Duri has great insticts and probably senses the danger lol. He'll do his part by paying you special attention. 🐺
I'm so glad you enjoyed your early Christmas present! ^_^
back again to announce my undying love for oswin.
lovely chapter. lovely new characters. super excited for the next one. <3
Welcome back! I'm happy you enjoyed it. Oswin will be pleased. ^_^
I tried to load my progress from my disc but it wont upload... Maybe a bug or something else perhaps? I was waiting for the update but imma start from the 1st chapter now lol
anyway, Dear author you have golden hands! I luv everything!!!!
Not necessarily a bug, but saves were going to be broken for sure. Some of the code from the first chapters had to be altered to get Ch 5 to work, and in order to get fonts to change correctly I had to change a few other things around - it was a whole deal. But future updates should also include a skip function so just in case saves break or you just want to try other things that will be an option instead of speedrunning 300million passages, lol. I am glad you still love it though, my dear, you are too kind. ^_^
ahh, didnt know saves could be broken... thanks for updates and making things much much better <33
nice game right here keep the work up its one of my favorites following up to speaker and crimson veil and a few select others
Thank you, my friend! I LOVE Speaker too. Haven't heard of Crimson Veil though, is that on itchio?
yep its a vampire game who uses rpgmaker
LETS GOO
Where are we going!? :D
lol
I went back into the game today, and all my saves and progress were gone. Every time I opened the game they would be there, but today is an exception. I was just about to start Chapter 4, too. I will download my saves for my next playthrough, though I imagine it will take a few days to get back to where I was. But the game is definitely worth that time.
I'm so sorry, my friend. I knew saves would break. There was just too much that ended up changing for chapter 5 to work. I will be implementing a skip function as a sort of failsafe in the future though. Thank you for sticking with it though and spending the time to get through it. ^_^
Yayyy chapter five so happy right now
You and me both! ^_^
Weirdly after a few replays oswin s growing on me I found him a bit dry on the early chapters but he seems to have more a personality in chapters 4 too 5 Duri will always be best boy though for me will there ever be a poly route?
Love it . can't wait for the update.
Glad you enjoyed my dear! I anticipate chapter 6 sometime between this coming March and May. ^_^
awesome. Have a great christmas and a happy new year.
I think I found a Error in the spicy part with Zahn. Also I played till the end and this story is sooo good. I cant wait for more❤
Thank you so much! Zahn gave me so many fits, so this really helps! (Spent 4 hours troubleshooting their whole scene today, lol). Glad you enjoyed my friend!
Thank you for blessing me with this update tonight!!! I love your work so much!! Can't wait to read more <333
You are very welcome dear, I hope you enjoy it! ^_^
I'm finally finished, that was way too long to be called a 'Demo' are you adding content to it or was that actually an original Demo. Anyways, After I hit chapter 4, I restarted 8 times because, I usually flirt with every woman until I decide who I want to romance, then I restart. And this time I decided I wanted Duri, so I restarted several times because I got uselessly picky and I wanted to see what Duri would say if our hair was Grey like hers. I really can't resist picking Cooking as my skill, the description draws me in the most, and I like to cook IRL as well. Swordplay only interests me because I want to know if I can beat Oswin in that sparring match If I learn Swordplay. Great 'Demo' overall, Spectacular even, Phenomenal, Amazing, Sprezzaturian Level work right here.
The "demo" label just means it's not finished yet. There's not currently (nor I believe ever will be, though I can't verify that) a distinction between a demo and a complete version.
Appreciate the verification
Hello there! Thanks for reading. I agree, this is HUGE, lol. I added the "demo" actually as part of a requirement for the Amare Games jam submission. I guess it technically still is one, but it is growing ferociously. Part of that growth actually is that I may add a few more comments on hair/eye variations as well. The cook is a good choice too, I have some fun writing their variations - Chapter 5 now has some really fun ones for them. I try to channel my mother when I think of cook MCs, she's the toughest and tiniest woman I know (she's almost 80 and I am still scared of her). I'm glad you enjoyed it, my friend! I hope there is more in the update that you will like as well. ^_^
okay I just spent two days reading this and I’m blown away. I love the concept so much??? The world you built feels incredibly alive, I really did feel like I was actually there while reading. I love the insane amount of variations you’re doing with the flirting choices 🫶🏽 OSWIN HAS MY HEARTTTT I love his whole character and the dynamic you can build with him is beautiful. To be honest, I love all the LIs you’ve introduced so far. Zahn and Duri are everything to me as well. The customisation + branching is SO good. I’m so excited to see where this goes and I can’t believe I only just got around to reading it (it’s been in my library for while!) I LOVE UR WORK‼️🫶🏽 thank u!!
I did have a question: I know u have a form to report bugs etc, does this include typos you’d want readers to point out? I hope that doesn’t come across nit-picky x
Thank you, my friend! I'm so happy you enjoyed it! I'm cooking up more and will have an update soon as well. You are welcome to report typos too in the error form, but you may be there all day, lol. Once chapter 5 is out (*cough, later this weekend I hope, cough*), all the chapters are getting a good old scrub for typos and such. Not a full re-work, just a polish. I figured out a system to help me find those pesky errors (I am dyslexic & ADHD, which makes editing a super-challenge), and I think I can make some good improvements with what I've worked out. So, I still welcome any help you want to provide, but please don't put yourself out either, my dear. ^_^
loved reading these 4 chapters and was able to relate heavily as I have chronic issues :)
Oswwiiiinnnn......T_T <3 ugh
Glad you enjoyed it! I hope the illness didn't hit you in the feels too hard. ^_^
I just hit chapter 3 and I gotta say, the story is great. Very unique, the descriptions in just about everything is impeccable, I never thought words could make me flinch but when that Cow was dying giving birth I actually cried and that surprised the hell out of me. The customization is vast and important surprisingly and the Characters are okay too, I honestly only care for my Parents but hey. Only problem I have is. WHERE. ARE. THE. WOMEN. I saw the Gender-Selectable people before I started righting this but I don't think I've seen a woman our age besides Kanta who's a One Night Stand. I most definitely gotta restart though, reread and all that.
Thank you, my friend! I am glad you are enjoying it! I hope the death of the cow didn't hit too hard, and if it's any consolation - I cried while writing it. I love cows, all animals really, it was hard. And I'm not sure where all the women are, lol. MC just isn't around many other people their age, in general, at least in the glimpse you get into their early life (there will be more memories and new characters that pop up later though). Willow, who becomes Lakota's wife, doesn't get screen time for the sake of story-focus (yet, more on her in ch 6 in future), but she's probably the main woman around MC that is around their age. The twin sisters are a decent bit older and have this silent-watcher thing going and Betony is more of a mom role. It's not intentional, I can promise you that. I also don't care much for typical gender roles so I tend to write male characters that fill roles you typically see for women characters or with characteristics that tend to get stereotyped as feminine. And I like women-badies (that goes for villains big and small, and general badasses).
The Twinflower women have some secrets, btw. I hope it isn't too much of a downer and dampens your enjoyment. ^_^Oswin, my love.
finished the demo and Y'ALL I CAN'T SAY HOW MUCH I LOVE OSWIN ENOUGHHH
Just wait, teehee! ^_^
I'm soooo exciteddd please i need more oswinnnn
I know I already commented but this is so good afdlkhdsajkfhasfdhgadjkfhgsljfkdghl;dkjdskjfajhjsdghbfsjldgd
LOL Well, it's still nice to see you again, dear. ^_^
I'm very excited for the next chapter! Are we going to be able to meet Rune? So far, it's been at least one LI introduction per chapter. Keep up the great work. Take breaks when you need them and hope you enjoy your holidays. <3
I am also excited for the next chapter! It was delayed from my original goal of November, but it is getting so very close to being ready. I'm editing some final parts and might actually add a bit more to it too (just a tiny bit, another little kiss at the end). ^_^
Oh, yay, I'm so excited to hear about it! I can't wait to read it. ^_^
I just finished the fourth chapter and woah… this is awesome?? It’s very well written and the level of choices and customization is so much more than I’ve seen in games in a similar format. You should be really proud of yourself, Lunan, and make sure to rest when you need it!! :)
Thank you, my friend! I am pleased with it. Comments like this help with my confidence that this is something people truly enjoy. ^_^
Literally so good, I finished it in one session lol.
I hope you had a really solid sleep after that, my dear! Or some eye drops at least, lol. ^_^
Lunan poly route please I'm beggin you
Sorry, my dear, for this story it likely won't happen. But I am considering it for future ones! I just want to write that sort of love story with as much authenticity as I can. ^_^
i understand, dw. glad you're considering it for other projects though, i'd love to see it. <3
❤️❤️
I love Oswin
I would say he loves you back, but Oswin would get all huffy and embarrassed and it would be a whole thing, lol. Just hang on a bit and he'll tell you himself. ;)
Thanks for your work and I enjoyed my time. Read through it in a couple of evenings as when I get into books/stories I tend to power through them.
*Warning* Very light spoilers ahead but I’ll try to keep it vague.
I was already quite interested in the setting and story from the start but I found I became more invested after chapter 3 when things open up more and it feels you have more choices to make and influence on how it all unfolds.
You really do a good job with making some of the even more mundane choices feel surprisingly meaningful among IFs that I’ve read. Even things like hair/eye colour had a couple interesting bits in the story attached to them beyond just being tags for your character’s appearance. I was also impressed with things like your choice of career pursuit and hobby having interactions.
For feedback, not too much to complain about. There were some spelling and grammar mistakes but it wasn’t too frequent and this is still a work in progress. Some more customization options would be nice I suppose? I think it is already quite good though, and I appreciate being able to customize the mc at all. I’m biased in this regard as I really enjoy character creation/customization.
I look forward to more and hope all goes well for you.
Thank you so much for the feedback, I'm glad that you found your read enjoyable. I have really loved doing this project and trying to fit in things that I would want to see while reading IFs. My goal is to make those facets of your character feel as real as possible while trying to avoid ham-fisting it. When I get a spot of time to sit down and clean up the first few chapters (definitely going to hit the grammar hard then too), I want to add a bit more customization and refine what is already there. If you have ideas for additions, I happily take suggestions. If you prefer, you can pop them into the error report form instead. It's linked in the game. ^_^
on bro let me hit that wolf
LOL! Actually, in chapter 6, there's a whole segment planned just for that.
Can't wait for the next chapter bcoz this was so fun!! I was completely invested, the plot is great and the characters are well-written. Duri really swept me off my feet as soon as he appeared lol I folded so fast 🤭
I'm so glad you had fun, my dear! Trying to get the update out the first week of December (hit some delays in November, but it's getting there)! Duri has been a persistent heart-stealer, lol. Very appropriate. ^_^
im deep into chapter four and i dont wanna finish it yet 💔but holy moly... this game is so good what the flip, Oswin has to be my favorite so far :D i also love the map of the clearing in chp3, unexpected but it was super cool!!1 Definitely have gained a new devoted follower, cant wait for this to be updated C:
Thank you, my friend! I am very glad you connected with it, and I am happy you're here. ^_^
I'm currently working on an update too. I was really trying to get it out in November, but life kinda got in the way, so I'm thinking it's going to be the first week of December instead.
omg i love the plot and the characters- damn they're so fine. Also is there a chance that there's poly routes!! I would love to see one with Duri and Oz, literally one's a wolf and u have a guy trying to convince evryone that wolves will never hurt anyone unless necessary though not necessarily Duri in particular >:D seems like there could be more going on HAHA literally thinking abt how Oz may bicker with Duri when he's in human form but softens whenever he's in wolf form bcos he can't help his fondness for his wolf form! eager for the next chapter while i go back to studying for my finals hehe :3
Hello my friend! I am glad that you are enjoying it! Unfortunately for this story, there won't be poly routes, but I can def see where a Duri-Oswin match would be a lot of fun though (super flipping cute!). In future IFs, I may do some poly romances, but for these characters for one reason or another, I didn't feel that it fit them as well. It's something I've been mulling on though, so we'll see what happens! ^_^
peak fiction fr ToT I AM SOSOSO INVESTED TO SEE HOW THIS TURNS OUT!!!!
comments on our companions/ROs
(playing with a female character for now)
oswin: he's got that dawg in him but i like his protective spirit
zahn: such a goofy goober, love him
duri: why does he remind me of gale and halsin from BG3 at the same time
i love the dads and lakota sm!!! they really make me feel like my character got the love she needs to keep going!
and i love my horsie Luchika ofc :3
keep it up!!! I really am invested to see how this goes!
if there's one thing i can recommend
listen to some music when writing <3 really helps get you into the vibe of what you write... i personally listened to the MHRise soundtrack while reading because oml it fit well with my character (fiorayne)...
but enough yapping from a monster hunter nerd... ENJOY THIS PEAK! i'm rooting for you!! and in the words of palpatine... "We will watch your career with great interest."
-love, LightningMeliodas, just a random monster hunter nerd and avid gamer.
Thank you my dear! I am so glad you are enjoying the story and characters! There will be more to love soon. I also love some tunes while I write or read, I'll check out that soundtrack too! ^_^
rip cow :(
(this is sososososso good omg)
Thank you, my friend! Sorry about the cow, lol. ^_^
I just finished through chapter 4 and I love this so muchhh. (btw maybe spoilers so CAUTION :> )
Anyways, I just want to say how much I love this story, the world building, even the characters!
I love the parents so muchhh, right when they were mentioned, I already loved them (I even maybe almost cried at a few scenes including the cow scene tbh )
I also really love all the little details and interactions with the characters and how they interacted w/ each other (platonic or not).
And I just wanted to say, the world building of this story is amazing, every little addition to the story always left me a little amazed. I really can't wait until chapter 5 comes out!
Though I do understand writing all that takes a lot time (and work!) So take your time ofc! Take breaks if you need them!
Anyways, for now, I'll probably re-play for each of the romances/companions (prob Duri first) >:D
Thank you so much for the kind words, my friend! I am so glad you are finding so much to enjoy. I can't wait to get chapter 5 out, my goal is to have it out this month (it's been a rough month though, but I am striving forward on it)! ^_^